How to create a family secret phrase
A family 'secret word' is one of the simplest, strongest defences against AI-voice and 'help me' emergency scams. If a call or message claims to be a relative in trouble, you ask for the word. This guide shows how to choose one, share it safely, and use it.
Quick answer
A family 'secret word' is one of the simplest, strongest defences against AI-voice and 'help me' emergency scams. If a call or message claims to be a relative in trouble, you ask for the word. This guide shows how to choose one, share it safely, and use it.
- Pick a word unrelated to public info (not a pet/birthday).
- Tell close family in person or via a private call.
- Agree the rule: no secret word, no money.
Do this now
- Choose a memorable word/phrase that isn't public or guessable.
- Share it in person or by a trusted channel - never by public post.
- Agree everyone must ask for it before sending money in an 'emergency'.
Understanding what happened
A family secret word is a tiny bit of effort that defeats a whole class of scams - the 'help me, it's an emergency' calls and messages, including ones using AI-cloned voices. If someone claims to be a relative in trouble, you simply ask for the word, and a scammer won't have it.
It works because it relies on shared private knowledge, not on how convincing a voice or story sounds. As voice and video fakes get cheaper and better, 'it sounded just like them' is no longer proof - but a word only your family knows still is.
Choose something memorable but not guessable: avoid pet names, birthdays, or anything findable on social media. Share it in person or through a trusted private channel, never in a public post, and make sure the most vulnerable family members know and remember it.
Agree the rule that goes with it: no secret word, no money - no exceptions, no matter how urgent the caller sounds. Practise it once so it feels natural under pressure, refresh it if it's ever shared too widely, and pair it with bank alerts for extra safety.
First 5 minutes
- Pick a word unrelated to public info (not a pet/birthday).
- Tell close family in person or via a private call.
- Agree the rule: no secret word, no money.
First 24 hours
- Make sure elderly relatives know and remember it.
- Practise once so it feels natural under pressure.
- Decide a backup question if someone forgets it.
Next 7 days
- Refresh it if it's ever shared too widely.
- Pair it with bank alerts and app-based 2FA.
- Remind family during any scam discussion.
What not to do
- Do not post or text it where it could be seen or stored.
- Do not pick something guessable from social media.
- Do not skip telling the most vulnerable family members.
How to report
- Gather your evidence first (screenshots, dates, amounts, any reference numbers).
- Report to your national fraud/cybercrime body and, if money moved, to your bank.
- Find the right official links for your country in the reporting directory.
Find official reporting links for your country in the reporting directory.
- Do not use phone numbers or links from the suspicious message - look up the official ones yourself.
- Report quickly if money was sent or ID documents were shared; speed improves your options.
- Keep your evidence - see how to save scam evidence.
Beware 'recovery' offers afterwards: anyone who contacts you promising to get your money back for an upfront fee is running a second scam.
Stop it happening again
Make sure the most vulnerable family members know and remember the word, and practise once so it feels natural under pressure.
Refresh the word if it's ever shared too widely, and pair it with bank alerts and app-based two-step verification.
Related scam types
Related red flags
Related terms
This is general safety information, not legal, financial, or cybersecurity incident-response advice.
Frequently asked questions
Why does a secret word work?
AI can fake a familiar voice or face, but not a private word only your family knows. It's a quick, reliable check.
What makes a good secret word?
Something memorable but not public - avoid pet names, birthdays, or anything findable on social media.
Why does a secret word beat AI scams?
AI can clone a voice or face, but not a private word only your family knows. Asking for it is a fast, reliable way to verify a real emergency.